God our Heavenly Mother and Father
We are said to have been created in the image of God, okay, so what does that mean.
On a soul level, if we are in the image of God, then as we are also told we have a soul-mate, it's conceivable God is a Soul-Pair. So that means God like us has both, on the personality level, an expression of the masculine and feminine. And as we're God's children, we're Their children, just like Them. They are our Heavenly Parents, our Heavenly Mum and Dad, our Heavenly Mother and Father. And so does that mean when we grow up we'll be big God's just like Them, or will we stay little gods, or will we always remain, simply - Their children.
So when you long for the Divine Love, long to each of Them separately and see how you feel about that. Long to Them as One. And if like me you enjoy relating to God as being Two, my Mother and my Father, then it certain opens things up. When I speak to Them I now get a reply from each of Them, just as I would have liked to have got one from each of my parents. And some days I'm more Father focused, other days more Mother. And some days it's the Father who comes and speaks to me through my feelings or in my mind, other days the Mother. Now I could be making all of this up, it might be that there is only One God and I need as part of my fucked evilness to relate to God some days as a Mother and other days as a Father, but the further I go in my healing, the stronger the feeling of there being One Soul that is God, but with Two Personality Expressions, and I love that. It makes me feel closer to Them, unlike when I read the Urantia Book and the Padgett Messages and it's all always the Father this, the Father that. I find myself crying out after a time: BUT WHERE IS THE MOTHER! WHAT ABOUT HER! And even though the UB says the Supreme Being - the God evolving out of experience, is the Mother, still, that can be so as well, as I relate to It also as a He and She, but it doesn't fill the spot in me when I reach out and long to my Heavenly and existential Parents as in the Mother and Father.
As my feelings become more liberated, as I connect with my repressed yuk from my early childhood; as I uncover the truth of it, so I enjoy more the personalness of relating to God as my Mother and my Father. And not as some people say, a Mother/Father God, but as two very distinct personalities, just as my parents were two very different people. It gives me comforting feelings to feel there is a Mother there for me, one who loves me, and not only a Father. It brings me closer to Them, as the mother is naturally closer, she being closer to her feelings and emotions.
I firmly believe that part of the plot, even call it a conspiracy - the Greatest of all Conspiracies, has been to deny us any relationship with our Heavenly Mother or as seeing God in the light of the feminine. And owing to the restrictions imposed upon them and their having to comply with them, the Urantia Book and Padgett Messages toe the line, they are unable to bring in and openly include the Feminine Aspect of God - and the feminine aspect of truth, for that matter, because Mary Magdalene was denied taking her rightful place.
You see, even though Mary and Jesus are the head of our local universe being the Creator Pair, as they are true and perfect divinity, they are like the Mother and Father, also not interfering with our negative state unless we ask them to. And as we didn't ask them to come to Earth, so they came of their own accord, but in strict keeping with the mandates and so limitations and restrictions of the Rebellion and Default. Jesus terminated the Rebellion in spirit, but neither of them terminated it on Earth. And they still don't interfere with us. Jesus honouring his promise to return did so with the Padgett Messages, at least in part, he might still come again in person, but he did so without going against the mandates of the Rebellion and Default. So even in the Padgett Messages neither Jesus or the Celestial spirits talk about or reveal the feminine aspect of truth because they can't, it's not their place to do so. That's Mary's role. But as she too must uphold the mandates of the Rebellion and Default, because it wasn't her place to interfere with it in flesh, so we've only been given a fragment of the truth by them.
I know this all might sound confusing, and does it really matter if you don't understand it, but for us to understand what's really going on, we have to look behind the exterior, deeper into how these things are presented to us. We have to uncover the truth for ourselves, and as we're living untrue, so the revelations to us have to be in keeping with our untruth, meaning they can't reveal more to us than we're ready for. So as we decide to end our evilness and seek only the truth, more truth can be forthcoming, and that's what is to happen during the next age. And that's why Jesus tells us in contemporary messages that there's a vast army amassing to once and for all vanquish evil. But what he's really saying is, there is a huge number of Celestials spirits that are eagerly awaiting the dawning of the next age because when that happens all their restrictions will be finally lifted, and they along with the Divine Love mansion world spirits, will be able to come and directly help us. So the mind spirits will no longer have it all their way.
And along with this New Age, so must come a new revelation of God, and because of this, that's where I see the Heavenly Mother being revealed. And it will also mean the feminine aspect of truth, as in Mary, will finally be able to have her say; and the feminine sides of our natures we'll finally be able to accept and express - all our emotions and feelings that we currently deny.
So there is not going to be a dimensional shift into the forth or even fifth dimension like so many of the New Agers believe, what there is however going to hopefully be, is more focus on our feelings, and in particular those ones we're denying.
For there to be a sudden shift of consciousness like the New Agers believe, is only yet another fantasy that will once and for all elevate all those people in the know, above and beyond all their bad feelings. It's simply more bad feeling denial. They think how it is in the mind mansion worlds for those spirits it will be for them on Earth, they'll be able to communicate telepathically and so on, but it's not going to happen that way. In the aeons to come, when humanity fully heals itself, sure, life on Earth will become more attuned to and reflect spirit world life, but for now, all that's going to happen, indeed all that is currently happening to do with the End Times, is designed to start breaking down our mind control, breaking down the systems we've built with it, all so we have to start facing and so dealing with our feelings. And in particular, our bad ones. So the more pressure that's brought to bear on humanity, the better because the harder it will be us to keep denying our bad feelings and keep ploughing on in our evilness. If evil is to come to an end on our world, it's going to happen through our starting to honour and give respect to our feelings, not other way. Anything that denies our feelings is only more of the same, just presented in a different way. We have to use our feelings to uncover the truth, we can't do it with our minds and information alone. We can only add to our evilness if we go the mind way because our minds are already so heavily in control.
On a soul level, if we are in the image of God, then as we are also told we have a soul-mate, it's conceivable God is a Soul-Pair. So that means God like us has both, on the personality level, an expression of the masculine and feminine. And as we're God's children, we're Their children, just like Them. They are our Heavenly Parents, our Heavenly Mum and Dad, our Heavenly Mother and Father. And so does that mean when we grow up we'll be big God's just like Them, or will we stay little gods, or will we always remain, simply - Their children.
So when you long for the Divine Love, long to each of Them separately and see how you feel about that. Long to Them as One. And if like me you enjoy relating to God as being Two, my Mother and my Father, then it certain opens things up. When I speak to Them I now get a reply from each of Them, just as I would have liked to have got one from each of my parents. And some days I'm more Father focused, other days more Mother. And some days it's the Father who comes and speaks to me through my feelings or in my mind, other days the Mother. Now I could be making all of this up, it might be that there is only One God and I need as part of my fucked evilness to relate to God some days as a Mother and other days as a Father, but the further I go in my healing, the stronger the feeling of there being One Soul that is God, but with Two Personality Expressions, and I love that. It makes me feel closer to Them, unlike when I read the Urantia Book and the Padgett Messages and it's all always the Father this, the Father that. I find myself crying out after a time: BUT WHERE IS THE MOTHER! WHAT ABOUT HER! And even though the UB says the Supreme Being - the God evolving out of experience, is the Mother, still, that can be so as well, as I relate to It also as a He and She, but it doesn't fill the spot in me when I reach out and long to my Heavenly and existential Parents as in the Mother and Father.
As my feelings become more liberated, as I connect with my repressed yuk from my early childhood; as I uncover the truth of it, so I enjoy more the personalness of relating to God as my Mother and my Father. And not as some people say, a Mother/Father God, but as two very distinct personalities, just as my parents were two very different people. It gives me comforting feelings to feel there is a Mother there for me, one who loves me, and not only a Father. It brings me closer to Them, as the mother is naturally closer, she being closer to her feelings and emotions.
I firmly believe that part of the plot, even call it a conspiracy - the Greatest of all Conspiracies, has been to deny us any relationship with our Heavenly Mother or as seeing God in the light of the feminine. And owing to the restrictions imposed upon them and their having to comply with them, the Urantia Book and Padgett Messages toe the line, they are unable to bring in and openly include the Feminine Aspect of God - and the feminine aspect of truth, for that matter, because Mary Magdalene was denied taking her rightful place.
You see, even though Mary and Jesus are the head of our local universe being the Creator Pair, as they are true and perfect divinity, they are like the Mother and Father, also not interfering with our negative state unless we ask them to. And as we didn't ask them to come to Earth, so they came of their own accord, but in strict keeping with the mandates and so limitations and restrictions of the Rebellion and Default. Jesus terminated the Rebellion in spirit, but neither of them terminated it on Earth. And they still don't interfere with us. Jesus honouring his promise to return did so with the Padgett Messages, at least in part, he might still come again in person, but he did so without going against the mandates of the Rebellion and Default. So even in the Padgett Messages neither Jesus or the Celestial spirits talk about or reveal the feminine aspect of truth because they can't, it's not their place to do so. That's Mary's role. But as she too must uphold the mandates of the Rebellion and Default, because it wasn't her place to interfere with it in flesh, so we've only been given a fragment of the truth by them.
I know this all might sound confusing, and does it really matter if you don't understand it, but for us to understand what's really going on, we have to look behind the exterior, deeper into how these things are presented to us. We have to uncover the truth for ourselves, and as we're living untrue, so the revelations to us have to be in keeping with our untruth, meaning they can't reveal more to us than we're ready for. So as we decide to end our evilness and seek only the truth, more truth can be forthcoming, and that's what is to happen during the next age. And that's why Jesus tells us in contemporary messages that there's a vast army amassing to once and for all vanquish evil. But what he's really saying is, there is a huge number of Celestials spirits that are eagerly awaiting the dawning of the next age because when that happens all their restrictions will be finally lifted, and they along with the Divine Love mansion world spirits, will be able to come and directly help us. So the mind spirits will no longer have it all their way.
And along with this New Age, so must come a new revelation of God, and because of this, that's where I see the Heavenly Mother being revealed. And it will also mean the feminine aspect of truth, as in Mary, will finally be able to have her say; and the feminine sides of our natures we'll finally be able to accept and express - all our emotions and feelings that we currently deny.
So there is not going to be a dimensional shift into the forth or even fifth dimension like so many of the New Agers believe, what there is however going to hopefully be, is more focus on our feelings, and in particular those ones we're denying.
For there to be a sudden shift of consciousness like the New Agers believe, is only yet another fantasy that will once and for all elevate all those people in the know, above and beyond all their bad feelings. It's simply more bad feeling denial. They think how it is in the mind mansion worlds for those spirits it will be for them on Earth, they'll be able to communicate telepathically and so on, but it's not going to happen that way. In the aeons to come, when humanity fully heals itself, sure, life on Earth will become more attuned to and reflect spirit world life, but for now, all that's going to happen, indeed all that is currently happening to do with the End Times, is designed to start breaking down our mind control, breaking down the systems we've built with it, all so we have to start facing and so dealing with our feelings. And in particular, our bad ones. So the more pressure that's brought to bear on humanity, the better because the harder it will be us to keep denying our bad feelings and keep ploughing on in our evilness. If evil is to come to an end on our world, it's going to happen through our starting to honour and give respect to our feelings, not other way. Anything that denies our feelings is only more of the same, just presented in a different way. We have to use our feelings to uncover the truth, we can't do it with our minds and information alone. We can only add to our evilness if we go the mind way because our minds are already so heavily in control.
Hating and loving God
Another of the difficulties Marion and I have had to come to terms with, and we're still working on it, concerns our relationship with God.
Having been brought up on 'God is Love', what happens when you come to understand that God is doing all of this to us. Doing it to YOU! We are not evil by our own design, it has been imposed on us, first by our parents, but before them, ultimately by God. God has incarnated us into this evil world for reasons of Their own, all of which should come to light as we grow in truth healing our negative love-denying condition, but in the meantime, it's still something we have to come to terms with.
We pray to God to heal us, to help us see the truth of our yuk, and we trust They will honour our prayers. And that's all very well, but when you start to feel very angry with God because They are the ones subjecting you to it, They are your torturer whom you're told you have to love, then you don't know what to do with such bad feelings. Do you allow yourself to hate God with all your heart because God has subjected you to such cruelty and suffering, that God makes you feel so bad. But how then do you go to God longing for Their Divine Love when you hate Them, when you're feeling really pissed off with Them for doing this to you and keeping you in the shit.
And what you do, is keep on expressing ALL your feelings. I'm sure God doesn't mind you abusing the shit of Them, They are NOT going to punish you. And besides, it's what God wants for us to do when we're ready to heal ourselves, so we have to love and hate God all at once. However, if you do feel God will punish you, then there is more bad feelings for you to express and long for the truth of.
And then even more anger surfaces when you realise that God isn't going to magically heal you as one might assume from the Padgett Messages. That God makes us do all the hard healing work of uncovering the truth ourselves. So that's just great, God the fucker put us in the shit and then God leaves us to get ourselves out of it - Great! But oh, then there's even more. God being so loving is subjecting us to all our pain, They are inflicting it on us, and if we want to remain evil, They help us, making it seem like we are going in the right direction - just as They have been doing right throughout our evil life. Look at all those people who believe God is helping them, sure God is, helping them to keep on deny their bad feelings and be as evil as they can. And then if we decide to do our healing, well hey, guess what, God then helps us to do that. God is very nice helping us to do whatever we please. That's true unconditional love. But God put you in the yuk - how conditional is that?
And then you go even further and deeper into yourself and you come to see that really you don't have as much of a say in your life at all, you only believe you do, and behind it all, which it has to be, God is well in control.
Being evil we're God-hating. So we have to fully honour that. We can't pretend we love God when we're denying all that God is - love, truth, goodness and beauty. We have to stop and accept that whether we like it or not, and even though we didn't have a say in it, God is making us hate Them by putting us in and keeping us in our evil state of being.
So what a fuck it is. And how confusing does it become. And it tears you apart trying to reconcile it all, you go this way and that, and just when you think you've got a handle on it, God brings up a new batch of bad feelings within you, and suddenly you're screaming with rage at Them or Him or whoever God is to you.
And then you come to understand, just to make it even more confusing, that in fact when you are feeling all these things about God, it's actually not God you're pissed off at, it's your own parents, you're only projecting all your shit onto God.
But I won't go on about it. The psychological depths involved in doing our healing are immense and require a lot of talking about. And I only want to introduce it here because it's a major part of Divine Love Spirituality.
So if you decide to do your healing, then all you can do is KEEP ON EXPRESSING ALL YOUR BAD FEELINGS WHILST SEEKING THE TRUTH OF THEM. That's how you heal yourself. That's how you'll eventually be able to get yourself out of your self-hate and God-hating state. That's how you will be able to heal your evilness. That's how one day you'll become true. And then you'll be all-loving as God is. And then conceivably you might even get to the point of one day acknowledging the most loving thing God did for you was subject you to evil, making you experience it first hand and making you get yourself out of it.
Having been brought up on 'God is Love', what happens when you come to understand that God is doing all of this to us. Doing it to YOU! We are not evil by our own design, it has been imposed on us, first by our parents, but before them, ultimately by God. God has incarnated us into this evil world for reasons of Their own, all of which should come to light as we grow in truth healing our negative love-denying condition, but in the meantime, it's still something we have to come to terms with.
We pray to God to heal us, to help us see the truth of our yuk, and we trust They will honour our prayers. And that's all very well, but when you start to feel very angry with God because They are the ones subjecting you to it, They are your torturer whom you're told you have to love, then you don't know what to do with such bad feelings. Do you allow yourself to hate God with all your heart because God has subjected you to such cruelty and suffering, that God makes you feel so bad. But how then do you go to God longing for Their Divine Love when you hate Them, when you're feeling really pissed off with Them for doing this to you and keeping you in the shit.
And what you do, is keep on expressing ALL your feelings. I'm sure God doesn't mind you abusing the shit of Them, They are NOT going to punish you. And besides, it's what God wants for us to do when we're ready to heal ourselves, so we have to love and hate God all at once. However, if you do feel God will punish you, then there is more bad feelings for you to express and long for the truth of.
And then even more anger surfaces when you realise that God isn't going to magically heal you as one might assume from the Padgett Messages. That God makes us do all the hard healing work of uncovering the truth ourselves. So that's just great, God the fucker put us in the shit and then God leaves us to get ourselves out of it - Great! But oh, then there's even more. God being so loving is subjecting us to all our pain, They are inflicting it on us, and if we want to remain evil, They help us, making it seem like we are going in the right direction - just as They have been doing right throughout our evil life. Look at all those people who believe God is helping them, sure God is, helping them to keep on deny their bad feelings and be as evil as they can. And then if we decide to do our healing, well hey, guess what, God then helps us to do that. God is very nice helping us to do whatever we please. That's true unconditional love. But God put you in the yuk - how conditional is that?
And then you go even further and deeper into yourself and you come to see that really you don't have as much of a say in your life at all, you only believe you do, and behind it all, which it has to be, God is well in control.
Being evil we're God-hating. So we have to fully honour that. We can't pretend we love God when we're denying all that God is - love, truth, goodness and beauty. We have to stop and accept that whether we like it or not, and even though we didn't have a say in it, God is making us hate Them by putting us in and keeping us in our evil state of being.
So what a fuck it is. And how confusing does it become. And it tears you apart trying to reconcile it all, you go this way and that, and just when you think you've got a handle on it, God brings up a new batch of bad feelings within you, and suddenly you're screaming with rage at Them or Him or whoever God is to you.
And then you come to understand, just to make it even more confusing, that in fact when you are feeling all these things about God, it's actually not God you're pissed off at, it's your own parents, you're only projecting all your shit onto God.
But I won't go on about it. The psychological depths involved in doing our healing are immense and require a lot of talking about. And I only want to introduce it here because it's a major part of Divine Love Spirituality.
So if you decide to do your healing, then all you can do is KEEP ON EXPRESSING ALL YOUR BAD FEELINGS WHILST SEEKING THE TRUTH OF THEM. That's how you heal yourself. That's how you'll eventually be able to get yourself out of your self-hate and God-hating state. That's how you will be able to heal your evilness. That's how one day you'll become true. And then you'll be all-loving as God is. And then conceivably you might even get to the point of one day acknowledging the most loving thing God did for you was subject you to evil, making you experience it first hand and making you get yourself out of it.
Living God's will
When I read the Padgett Messages having moved out of the New Age, all I wanted to do was live God's will. But how? Was longing for the Divine Love doing it? I didn't know, nothing seemed right. And I couldn't see anyone else was living it either, even though many people said they were, or the religions and spiritual systems said come to us and we'll show you. Jesus was all I had to go on.
Then I met Marion and she told me that for starters how could I possibly think I was living God's will if I wasn't even living true to my own will. I didn't have my own will to live God's will with. One can't live true to ones on will and so true to God's will if one is denying a part of oneself.
I had thought I could somehow get rid of my will transposing it for God's. I wanted God to take over my life and to tell me what to do - all through my mind. Marion said, you mean you want God to be like your mother and father always telling you want to do. You only want God to take over your parents role because that's all you know, it's what you're used to, so it think it makes you feel safe.
Marion then helped me to understand about my Childhood Repression, and how living true really meant going back into all my horrible bad feelings from my early life and re-connecting with them, bringing them all out. And, she went further, if you can manage to do that, then perhaps you will be in a position to live God's will. All right... I'll do my healing.
Through my healing I've come to understand living God's will is actually very simple. And as Marion said, to do it I first need my will fully in tact and functioning the right way. As it is, it's going against God, I'm using all my will to deny God, nature and myself, so that's no bloody good, I'm going in the wrong direction!
So as I do my Soul-Healing, which is also my will-healing, so I'm letting go of all my evilness, all that's making me deny my feelings, and I'm turning gradually around to honouring my feelings with my will fully supporting and expressing them. I'm giving up a mind-led life replacing it with a feeling-led one.
And I've come to see, living God's will is living true to oneself, which means, living true to ones feelings. So if one is living true, one is living true to ones will. And if one lives true to ones will, then one IS living also God's will. God wants us to live true to ourselves so we live as perfectly as They are. So it's as simple as that.
So to live God's will one needs to do ones healing, feeling- or soul-healing. If you haven't done that, then you're still in your negative state so can't be living true to God's will, you can't be living a life of true love. No matter what you might believe.
Now, it could also be argued that we're always living God's will anyway, even in our evil and feeling-denying state, because who else but God has put us in our evil states, made us evil, and is keeping us in them... but that's for another day.
Then I met Marion and she told me that for starters how could I possibly think I was living God's will if I wasn't even living true to my own will. I didn't have my own will to live God's will with. One can't live true to ones on will and so true to God's will if one is denying a part of oneself.
I had thought I could somehow get rid of my will transposing it for God's. I wanted God to take over my life and to tell me what to do - all through my mind. Marion said, you mean you want God to be like your mother and father always telling you want to do. You only want God to take over your parents role because that's all you know, it's what you're used to, so it think it makes you feel safe.
Marion then helped me to understand about my Childhood Repression, and how living true really meant going back into all my horrible bad feelings from my early life and re-connecting with them, bringing them all out. And, she went further, if you can manage to do that, then perhaps you will be in a position to live God's will. All right... I'll do my healing.
Through my healing I've come to understand living God's will is actually very simple. And as Marion said, to do it I first need my will fully in tact and functioning the right way. As it is, it's going against God, I'm using all my will to deny God, nature and myself, so that's no bloody good, I'm going in the wrong direction!
So as I do my Soul-Healing, which is also my will-healing, so I'm letting go of all my evilness, all that's making me deny my feelings, and I'm turning gradually around to honouring my feelings with my will fully supporting and expressing them. I'm giving up a mind-led life replacing it with a feeling-led one.
And I've come to see, living God's will is living true to oneself, which means, living true to ones feelings. So if one is living true, one is living true to ones will. And if one lives true to ones will, then one IS living also God's will. God wants us to live true to ourselves so we live as perfectly as They are. So it's as simple as that.
So to live God's will one needs to do ones healing, feeling- or soul-healing. If you haven't done that, then you're still in your negative state so can't be living true to God's will, you can't be living a life of true love. No matter what you might believe.
Now, it could also be argued that we're always living God's will anyway, even in our evil and feeling-denying state, because who else but God has put us in our evil states, made us evil, and is keeping us in them... but that's for another day.
Images courtesy of: [frog - Elwood W. McKay III]; [butterfly - thawats]; [butterflies - samurai]; [dew on moss - SweetCrisis]; [snake - PANPOTE]/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net
